Somewhere in the comments of this post ( found on fb) there is a man stating that black women do not go get treatment from mental health professionals. NOW, besides his approach and him being a man (touching a subject that is too sensitive for him to be addressing so carelessly given the history of black men not loving black women) However, there is some truth to this. You all know why I’m here (for the culture) and this is a great example. How will we know how to advocate for ourselves and change our narratives/ stereotypes if we don’t attempt to process our past situations and learn about ourselves. Seeking treatment isn’t only about talking to a stranger (at first) about your problems, it’s to learn new language, find out about yourself and why you operate the way you do. What influences you? Identifying your triggers in order to cope and avoid them.
It was recent that I learned I have anxiety let alone social anxiety. I have found that : My hard exterior is so that no one approaches me and puts me in an awkward position. I yell and become irritable when I feel like I have no control or someone changes a plan. It takes me a while to process transitions and I am rigid at times. Before all of this I was “mean” “didn’t like people” and “thought I was better than everyone” because I didn’t speak. Chile I even have separation anxiety, when my husband is gone I literally cannot function. ( I’m not giving them excuses Kings) Since I have learned about myself I have been able to recognize when things will effect me and learn to navigate and discuss with the people who will be affected by my behaviors or reactions.
SO, we will continue to be portrayed in this light until we go and learn of ourselves and start changing the conversations. People will continue to assume to worst of us until we began to find the words to articulate how intricate and delicately woven we are.
It is easy for someone to assume the worse about you. (They could utilize their great communication skills but 🤷🏾♀️) I mean who would’ve thought there might be a reason to why we present with anger etc. Now that I know about myself and have learned how to advocate for myself and my diagnoses, you may NOT call me these things, you may not say that I wear the pants in the relationship or that I have my husband whipped, and if you do he will not believe you.
You may not say that I don’t like people because once you get to know me I am sweet( yuck) and sensitive (also yuck). I know my truth however, it’s my job to let you know about the timebombs and boobie traps hidden in my mind.
I hope this makes sense.
With Love, For the Culture,